I’m a director. I yell “CUT!”, “ACTION!”, “THAT’S A WRAP!” and all the other nonsensical things that my people bark out. It’s a great gig. And I’ve been told I’m quite good at it.

I’ve directed sketchy politicians, pumped-up fitness professionals, corny comedians and kitschy country-western singers … but last week I met my match when I had to direct some fairly well-known drag queens for a charity photo shoot here at PlattForm.

For the record, I’ve never met a drag queen I didn’t like … even RuPaul, who has got to be 7’6”, I swear. And last week’s shoot was no exception to that rule. And, fortunately for all parties involved, my photographer Aaron had never met a drag queen he didn’t like. Well, technically … he had never actually MET a drag queen. So goal achieved, I guess.

Lest, I digress …

Now, if you’re a director, you’ve never really lived until you’ve been forced to yell things like “SPIN!”, “TWIRL”, “STRIKE A POSE!” At one point, there was so much glitter and fringe flying through the studio, I thought poor Aaron would have an asthma attack.

And then I had this epiphany … in the world of career colleges, why, oh why, is there no Drag Queen Institute? Or DQI, for short. I had to laugh because my mind immediately started racing and in .03 seconds I came up with DQI’s slogan … “Making over your career and your face … one student at a time.” Brilliant, huh? They could have branches and affiliates for smaller markets … like, maybe the You Go, Girl Academy. Sheer genius!

Lest I digress again …

So, if a picture tells a thousands words … I’ve included some pictures of last week’s shoot. Kudos to everyone who helped pull off a successful (and sequined) shoot to benefit AIDS Walk 2007. And polite apologies to a certain PlattForm Vice President who may or may not have walked into the men’s room during a rather … shall we say … precarious hairspray moment. And Lord knows I’m not even going to mention the lip gloss “incident.”