April 2006

My last entry extolled the effort PlattForm puts into ‘training and developing’ and what a great benefit it is for PlattFormers. That got me to thinking about some of the other “free” benefits that come just from working here. Now to put this into perspective, a previous agency that I worked for (which will go unnamed) touted the benefit of “having all the hot coffee you can drink.” (Seriously). So maybe my bar is set exceedingly low . . . or maybe that was just another era. . . nevertheless, as I look around, there’s a lot more than hot coffee to brag about here.

Of course, there’s the standard benefits: the health plan, the dental plan, yada yada yada. But what I’m talking about goes a little beyond your basic cafeteria-style HMO fare.

Like the 401K plan. Now wait. . . I know this screams “booor-ing” but hear me out. After you’re here for a year, the company will match you, up to 8% of your annual salary, for every dollar you contribute to a retirement plan. The best part? There’s no vesting schedule. That means whenever you decide to leave, that money is yours for the taking. It’s like getting an 8% raise every year!

Interested in something a bit more visceral? OK. How about our Friday meatings. No that’s not a typo. Every Friday from Memorial Day to Labor Day a different department grills lunch for every other department in the agency. (It’s almost always grilled—except for the time one department made peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and spent the rest of the budget on an amusement park moonwalk. . . and one would surmise: clean-up.)

Had one too many ribs at the “meating”? Well, burn it off in the full gym complete with free weights, machines and more treadmills than you’d ever care to tread upon. The gym comes complete with a personal trainer and licensed massage therapist—just make an appointment to have your stress from overeating massaged away.

Now don’t get the wrong idea. I’m not saying we don’t work hard here. We do. But with all the free benefits, I’m expecting to be called “Comrade” next time I walk down the hall to fill my cup with. . . that free hot coffee.

It comes every week without fail … Hump Day. And with it the midweek blahs. I’m talking about the feeling you get when your body realizes there is too much week left before your next weekend. It can be downright depressing if you give in to it.

Remedies for midweek blahs were few and far between. Imagine everyone’s surprise when famed Web Master Wade discovered Buzzword Bingo! It successfully vanquished Hump Day from the vocabulary of the Interactive team.

Every week, the resident web geeks gather for a friendly – sometimes rowdy – game of Buzzword Bingo. Themes have ranged from Movies That Should Never Be Sequels to Board Games if You Were a Kid in the ’80s to Family Guy.

With their eyes fixed on the prize (a candy bar from Mary’s secret stash), the team gathers around to play. Spirits are high. The anticipation is thick enough to slice with a knife as each buzzword is called. Then it happens – someone yells BINGO! and the crowd goes wild.

Although not quite Dante’s depiction of gnashing of teeth, you don’t want to be in the mix when a winner is identified. Gauntlets are thrown, words are exchanged and accusations of cheating are made.

A Buzzword Bingo regular was quoted as saying, “I was so close. Just one more and I’d be the winner instead.” Tough break, kid.

In the end, to the victor goes the spoil and the rest of the web geeks live to play Buzzword Bingo another Hump Day.

Work can be stressful sometimes. Who can’t agree with that?

Last week, the members of the PR Department decided to alleviate our workplace pressure by stepping away from our computers for a few moments for a stress-relieving, team-building activity.

We decided to play Chubby Bunny. If you’re unfamiliar with this game, I’ll explain the rules. Each participant takes a large marshmallow, places it in his or her mouth and says the words, “Chubby Bunny.” Going around the circle, the participants continue to stuff marshmallows in their mouths while repeating, “Chubby Bunny.” The person with the most marshmallows in their mouth at the end of the contest wins.

So there we sat in a circle with our trashcans, glasses of water and paper towels, ready to obliterate one another through friendly competition. Round one didn’t go so well. I believe it would have gone better could we all have stopped laughing. Department manager Kevin Kuzma was declared the victor after shoving eight large marshmallows into his mouth.

Unhappy with our defeat and feeling we could all do better than our counts of four, four and five, we challenged Kevin to a second round. With our game faces on, we were determined to prove our worth by stuffing our faces with even more fluffy treats.

Round two was marked by less laughter, but more gagging. I felt elated when I surpassed my first-round best of four marshmallows when I sandwiched my fifth marshmallow in my mouth. Erin, our resident copy writer, attempted a fifth marshmallow but succumbed to a fit of uncontrollable laughter and was out of the running. Sarah, our beloved PR intern, managed to squash in number five and passed the bag onto me. It was on now. Kevin was going to lose Chubby Bunny to a couple of girls!

Things were getting pretty difficult after marshmallow number six, but I managed to pass the bag on to Kevin. Despite his dancing and attempting to sing “Can’t Touch This” with a mouth full of marshmallows, Sarah and I weren’t going to laugh and lose this battle or the marshmallows stuffed into our mouths.

Sadly, the intern lost it on the sixth marshmallow. While I was sad to see her go, I was determined to soldier on. With seven marshmallows in my mouth, I could tell I was near the end. I wasn’t sure there was much more maneuvering I could do to fit any more marshmallows in my mouth, but I sure was going to try.

Like a crazy Chubby Bunny machine, Kevin further puffed out his cheeks and fit in an eighth marshmallow. I thought I could definitely fit in another marshmallow to tie for eight. I could have done it, too, if Kevin hadn’t started drooling pure marshmallow. That’s when I lost it and laughed my marshmallows into the trash can.

Although our manager may have won this battle, the war is not over. Next time we’re in need of some stress relief, we still have half a bag of marshmallows sitting around in the office.

About a year ago – around the time Charlie and the Chocolate Factory came out in theaters – Michael Platt had what many PlattFormers consider to be his BEST IDEA EVER. Buy a bunch of candy. Put it in a wagon. Wheel the candy around to the masses. And then watch the fun unfold.

It has since come to be known as SWEET TOOTH TUESDAY. And it was a brilliant stroke of genius! Get your employees hopped up on sugar and they are apt to work harder … or something like that. Sweet Tooth Tuesday has been both a blessing and a curse. On any given Tuesday afternoon after the Candy Wagon has moseyed through — hyperactivity begins to run amok in the building. People begin talking faster … typing faster … breathing faster. Small riots have practically broken out over who gets the last Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup.

The best part is watching the newbies at PlattForm try and fend off the older, stronger candymongers. It’s really survival of the fittest on Sweet Tooth Tuesday. Wait – check that – after a year of gorging myself on Twix bars – it’s really survival of the fattest. It’s funny … I can’t remember life before Sweet Tooth Tuesday – but, I’ll tell you this much, if Michael Platt ever takes it away from us … there will be anarchy.

Almost every day is a party at PlattForm, but with the arrival of spring, things are really heating up. Spring fever has hit with full force, evidenced by the appearance of flip-flops, shorts, capris and t-shirts. A few PlattFormers are sporting new tans (hmmm … spray on, perhaps?) and outdoor lunches and meetings are becoming more common.

I take the casual dress code at PlattForm for granted most of the time, but come spring, I can’t help but love the fact that I can wear sandals, skirts and t-shirts to work. With such a laid-back atmosphere, it’s easy to let your creativity run away with you, as Steve Booth, our COO and PlattForm penny-pincher, has recently discovered.

Here are some of the wacky requests he’s received from employees in the past two weeks:

• Lawn chairs, umbrellas, wireless laptops and those coconut cups with the mini straws in them
• A retractable roof
• Ice cream vending machines
• Daily afternoon naps in hammocks emblazoned with the company logo
• A dunking booth
• Water balloons and Super Soakers for those team-building exercises
• More grass, less concrete in the parking lot

While there’s little doubt in anyone’s mind that these seemingly innocent requests will be denied (there is work to be done, folks!), it’s still fun to dream about the possibilities.

And the great thing about PlattForm? You can dream. As a matter of fact, it’s very easy to take some of the requests above and turn them into “work.” What about a TV commercial showing a man frustrated in his job dreaming about doing the very things listed above? Then, what if he found out that with career training in the right field, he could work for himself from home?

The possibilities are endless, and here at PlattForm, the freedom to find and create those possibilities is one of the best perks of all.